Reuben is in charge!

Yesterday afternoon I went to visit my friends over at Ringo's Rat Tales. I no gotted to actually see the rats themselves, for surely I is so ferocious that they would run away forever and ever. Angela and Ringo gots a dog too - her name is Lucy, but she was in her crate because, much like Gretchen the Doxador, she likes to sprint out the front door and into the street at every opportunities. So even though I no could see or hear these not-very-fearsome animals, I could SMELL them. Something had to be done about that.

This is a file photo.

Imagine that here I is indoors, and that this tree is a nice container holding things in the living room. I did what any brave dachshund would do - I peed on it. Then Mama gasped and said "No Reuben, No! Bad Dog!" and it hurted my feelings, for I was only trying to prove that their house and all the things in it belongs to me. She picked me up and held me in a kind of football-cradle way for the rest of our visit, probably because she loves me so much and no can resist my beauties.

This morning Mama woked up and reached for her glasses and said "OW!" "What it is, Mama?" I asked, and she says, "Reuben, I has a great soreness in my arm from holding you for so long yesterday." Probably she could use the strength training I provides free of charge, so I is sure to receive some treats today for this important service. You're welcome, Mama!

Tonight I is all out of floppy tongue joy

Friends, I no has a lot of good newses today. Mama says we needs to stay positive, so here is one thing: When Mama and Daddy is cooking, I sniffs all around their foots for delicious falling foodstuffs. Always they is falling! Mama and Daddy use many garlicks in their cookings. You know how garlicks has those little skins all over them. They falls to the floor, and that is why I has a new nickname: "Garlic Nose." Always the garlick skins is stuck to my nose after dinners! It is adorable. 

It no is garlicks, but I think my tongue is stuck to my bed now.

But tonight I is having a great sadness. Daddy's daddy is a man they calls "Grandpa." (Actually, we has many grandpas in our family). This Grandpa lives on the farm where sometimes I go and do many, many peeings. Then I curls up and watches TV. Oh, also I eats all of Lizzie's food. But now, I no will be eating Lizzie's food anymore. Grandpa's poodle Lizzie has gone far away to the rainbow bridge. Always she was chasing cars, and not really paying many attentions to how dangerous they is. She gotted too close to the neighbor's truck. And you knows what happened next. Also I is sad for Gretchen; she loved to play with Lizzie. Gretchen does not know yet, but next time she goes to the farm to play she will have a great confusion, and then a great sadness too. 

There is more griefs in the house too. Our good friends at Ringo's Rat Tales is having a very tough time. I no knows all the details, but I does know that they has troubles, and Mama and Daddy is sad for them. My friend Lucy is their dog, and so I will try very very hard to no bark at her, or even pee in her yard. If my family had a sadness, I no would appreciate other dogs barking or peeing in my yard either. Even I no can give Lucy some delicious treats, because they gives her intestinal discomforts. All of us is trying to send happy energies to them. I hopes you has a few extra happy energies to send them too.

So for now I curls up on Mama's lap and has many great ponders about life. I hopes all the sadnesses will pass so I can go back to being my floppy-tongue joyful self, and the humans can be regular selves too.

I no is a stuffed animal

My mama's friends from Ringo's Rat Tales came to our house the other day and... well... some indignifications has occurred.

I is going to bite those ruby slippers right off Dorothy's feets.

Here I is still the Tin Man.

About this, I no is happy. Leah says I is a funeral person.

You know what? I is not even posting the rest of them. Not even for evidences of indignifications.  Instead, I posts a shot of me and my magnificent tongue. 

I is a lap dog when I no has anything to pee on.

In fact, I is typing this from Mama's lap right now. Of course I is a very busy dog, so I gets my naps whenever I can. Maybe I will post some more shots later. Right now it is time to lie on the couch and watch something called "Wizard of Ozzes." It is a pretty good movie, though of course Toto is not as big and frightsome as me. But he does a good job anyways.

A Amazing Fire Hydrant

This is a very interesting picture from the last year fair. Mama tells me it is fair time again. Not that I would have a knowing of that, since there no is dogs allowed at the fair. Maybe I will come to the front gate and pee on it. That is what I think of that.

Leah's school class took a trip to the fair last year, I thinks it is called a "kindergarten." This is her lovely teacher, Mrs. Payne, and her friend Ringo, who has a ratblog about his pet rats. They has a gigantic wardrobe and loves to change clothes all the time! I is having my wardrobe soon, because it is fall and I needs to keep warm at all times. That is why I make sure to eat as many foods as I can. It is for insulation.

Can you tell I has good insulation?