Oh, what a glorious day... I gets to have all my people in the house all day, I gets to smell the turkies in the oven all day, and then because I is such a patient and waitful dog, I get to eat the turkies later. Maybe stuffings too, and pumpkin pie. Mama has gotten something called "Tofurkies." And for that, I no has an understand. Also I has never seen her eat my dog food, so maybe she is not liking meats very much? That could only mean more for me, so that works out great, I is thinking!
|She is eating strange and untasteful things, like this.|
Because I is feeling gracious and charitable today, I is going to be talking about Gretchen. She is my girlfriend and also we lives together. Except she is bothering me all the time. Always she is wanting to "play," and she no is understanding that I is a very dignified wiener dog of gracefully advanced years who no "plays." One of these days, I is sure she will understand that based on my fearsome growling.
|A rare moment of us having nose-rubs.|
Oh, but I is being a good dog today. So, I will tells you she is what they calls a "doxadore." How you is spelling that? Maybe it is "dachshador." Anyways, she is a dachshund/lab mix, and while I has the softest coat in all the worlds, she has the smoothest. Also she is having some markings on her back that looks exactly like a harness!
|Gretchen says "cheese." Wait - you gots some cheese?|
Maybe I has not specified, but Daddy has a farm way out in the countries that we gets to visit a few times a week. There no is any fire hydrants, telephone poles, or smells of many other dogs. Instead I smells the wild animals, so of course I still has much work to do there, peeing on things. When we is there, Gretchen loves to bound joyfully through the woods, chasing squirrels and picking up new friends I think they is calling "ticks." She and I is both visiting the neighbor's dog Sugar, a guardful rottweiler almost as ginormous as me!
|Gretchen is almost as good-looking as me.|
When I is out there, I does lots of wandering and peeing, as I has stated. But again, due to my advanced years, I is getting tired and wanting to go in the house and eat all of Lizzie's food (she is grandpa's fuzzy poodle). One time I has hidden in the car and fallen fast asleep, and gave Daddy a great worry about where I was. So now, often I spend much time in the house when I visit, walking about stoutly, eating Lizzie's food and sleeping. What a good dog I is!
Oh, and Gretchen is a good dog too. Mostly. Since I is such a handsome and kind wiener dog, I is sharing my turkies with her on her first Thanksgivings with us. You are welcome, Gretchen. Also, please stop pooping on the floor.