Thursday, October 25, 2012

My new organimization DADBIM: Dogs Abandoned Downstairs By Insensitive Mamas

Friends, I wants to speak to you of a peril that affects many dogs with correct-sized legs, like me, and even dogs with freakishly long legs whose houses is unfortunately full of gates, stairs, doors and blockades of all kinds. All too often our mamas is leaving us all alone in the downstairs while they goes upstairs.

This dog has been left in the downstairs, and he no is happy about it.

What they has to does, I asks, that is so important that they no can carry their correct-sized dogs upstairs with them, and then back downstairs whenever said dog is ready to go Out? What horrible kind of thing they is doing to make them forget about us, leaving us alone in the downstairs? Is they bathing? Going potty in the bathroom (even though when I does that same thing, I is a bad dog)? Putting on clothes, those uncomfortable itchy things that keeps you from scratching your personal Self? I no knows. All I knows is that I is alone. This is unacceptable.

And this door is closed too.... WHY?!?!

If Mama is in the house or even near it, she no is allowed to go more than six foots away from me. This is so I can protect her and also get more belly rubs. When me and other dogs is left in the downstairs, bravely choosing to no climb the stairs, not because we is too short, because we no is, but because we is important and should be carried at all times.... we is forced to bark with increasing volumnes to remind our mamas that they has abandoned us in the downstairs, a offence punishable by a fine equal to no less than 87 bacons.

This is why I has decided to start my own organization. It is called

Dogs
Abandoned
Downstairs
By
Insensitive
Mamas

or

DADBIM 

DADBIM will has its first fundraiser next week to raise monies to buy bacons for dogs who has been abandoned in the downstairs for eleventy thousand hours. Or more. I is the executive directinoer and I is needing a vice directioner to boss around, a treasurers who can count to eleventy, and a secretary with opposable thumbs who is in charge of all phone dialing as pertains to foodstuffs deliveries.

I hopes you will join DADBIM in assisting indignant dogs everywhere who is forced to wait in the downstairs while their mamas do unnecessary things in the upstairs. Together we can stops this injustice - we is united in our quest to be fully dependant and constantly adored!

We no will be lefted alone in the shadows anymore!!!





18 comments:

  1. We is not a doggie, but sumtimes our Mommy, well, it's almost too awful, but, SHE SHUTS US OUTSIDE THE BATHROOM DOOR! Oh Reuben, it's just terrible. We need our own group, too. Bacon re-payment sounds purrfect!

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  2. Excellent idea Reuben! Why do they not bring us along? I can do stairs but I watch my momma go up and down and I stay down stairs. Why does this happen???

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  3. BOL Reuben maybe you can get enough green papers to buy one of those stairs lift thingies and then you can zip up and down the stairs all day long. Have a terrific Thursday.
    Best wishes Molly

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  4. You DESERVE that BACON! We're lucky, we don't have an upstairs.

    Squirrels are UP....they could attack your family, so they SHOULD take you upstairs with them....just sayin'

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

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  5. MOL MOL Reuben
    Mom cracked up and beclaws way back in the dark ages BM (no not that BM, Before Madi) Mom said she would have paid dearly for a 'downstairs'. You see the peeps were owned by a mighty mini Doxie Toto and his toddler sis! Both were attached to Mom at each hip every where she went. Where she tried to go potty Toto and his sis would sit outside the door. Toto was whining and sticking his paws under the door and his human sis was saying Mommy mommy are you finished.
    MOL I fell on the floor when she told me this story.
    hugs Madi your BFFF

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  6. How do we sign up to become a member of DADBIM? That same thing happens to us here in our NY house and we hate it! We sit at the bottom of the stairs and tell Mommy she sucks for leaving us. It's just not right Reuben and we need to bond together and stop the horror. We will do what ever it takes to help out this very fine organization.

    Hugs,
    Lily Belle & Muffin

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  7. Dear Reuben,

    What about Dogs who are left home alone while the people go out? I'm sure they go out somewhere wonderful... Like to hunt for food, or maybe even Beach or Forest without me. My person often goes to play with other Dogs!! How unfair is that??

    And I have to stay home. All by myself, with only the Cats for company. Sometimes they leave me with a Bone, but they are forgetting this important step a lot recently.

    What can I do about this terrible circumstance?

    Licks,
    Cobi

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  8. Your new organization makes me feel very glad that I do not have an upstairs! I can follow my mommy wherever she goes...yay!

    Poppy

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  9. Can we join even though our Lady leaves us upstairs? It is the same problem. If we got more bacons we probably would be happier. Hailey and Phod

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  10. It's nice of you to start this organization, Reuben. I hope thee neglected dogs will get more bacons
    Cotton

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  11. Howdy Reuben, you are not carried upstairs?? did you want us to call the RSPCA on your behalf mate? You know, sometimes we are locked OUTSIDE and not allowed in? We feel that's nearly as bad. Your mum should feel lucky she doesn't have to carry Rory upstairs! We hope your problems gets sorted out real soon. No worries, and love, Stella and Rory

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  12. Me think u need to speak to the Hugs Department. :)

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  13. HEY REUBEN!!!!! The Beaglebratz here. Did you hear 'boutz the Christmaas Gift x-chaange over at Jazzi''s place?
    http://jazzis-world.blogspot.com/2012/11/christmas-exchange-reminder.html

    Shiloh'n The DIVA Shasta

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  14. Nice to meet you Reuben. Yah I get confined to the main floor with those darn gates up so I cant go upstairs to the 2nd floor. Addi gets stuck in the basement. Great idea. for the exchange I will need your e-mail addy. Send to dcraftsalot@yahoo.com

    wags
    JAzzi

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  15. AAlmost furgot this tue - while u wuz over at Jazzi'z place, did u c the info 'bouts the Christmas CARD x-change? Find it here-
    http://www.jazzis-world.blogspot.com/2012/10/our-christmas-card-exchange.html

    Oh an'we like your new organizashum - then u can just say DADBIM'it and we will all know what u iz talkin'boutz.
    Shiloh'n The DIVA Shasta

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  16. What cruel & unusual punishment. This has to be stopped!

    Nubbin wiggles,
    Oskar

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  17. I want to join! Although I follow mom upstairs, downstairs, and into the bathroom, I totally understand. Because even though I'm right there, sometimes my mom totally ignores me and does things other than pet me, feed me, or otherwise entertain me. Sometimes she does things that have nothing to do with me! This type of cruelty must be stopped!

    your pal,
    Garth

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