Wednesday, October 26, 2011

I has another trip to the vet

Yes, today Mama took me to the vet. Again. But this time we went to our Greensboro vet. I went there all the way back when I was a rescued dog! She pulled out many of my tooths last year (I was having an anesthesia, so I no was aware of it), and on Thursday I go again to has even more tooths pulled. Mama and I is hoping I will get to keep Snaggletooth, as it is a very important part of my Reuben-ness. Mama says she will still love me, even if Snaggletooth has to go. We no can find out until I is down for the count on the operating table. Why? Well, has you tried to look in my mouth lately? If you has, I has also probably bited you. No offense, but it is MY mouth.

Mama got lost on the way there. She said her GPS gave imaginary directions, but I thinks Mama no is a very good navigator. 

I told you we should have gone south.

Really there is no good reason to post this picture, other than the fact that it is of me and I looks pretty good.

I like how the sun illuminates my beautifulness.

We got there a half hour late, and this was me in the exam room:

It has some interesting smells, let me tells you.
I was a good dog, and I no peed on anything in the whole room, even though it smelled like other dogs who might think they are bigger than me. Of course that no is true.

The vet poked and prodded and stuck needles in me, and the nurse vet violated me with her thermometer. Remind me to pee on her car next time. Everything on my long wiener body checked out good, except I has to come back for the mouth surgeries on Thursday. Of course, everyone in the office loved and adored me. It happens everywhere I go, so I no is amazed by that anymore. I is always posing for pictures and having many childrens rub my soft fur the wrong way. Sometimes it is hard to be me. 

Being me is a lot of work.
Oh, one last thing. This poster was in the exam room:

.....
It is true that Mama has no been happy with all the delicious foodstuffs I get from Daddy's dinner plate. "He has one dinner already, he no needs two!" she says. So she reminds him to no give me the tasty morsels, and then gives me a dog food bowl that frankly is a little smaller than I would prefers. Also I has walks in the park every day. So I finds this picture of me and Hatfield to be very rude. Hatfield and I is very good insulators, and also I think there was some Photo Shops involved. My collar is green, and Hatfield no has a collar even! We no has any of these diseases and is in excellent health. So I is checking with my lawyer to see about a defamation case. In case you forgot, Hatfield has a legal expertise:

His courtroom presence leaves much to be desired though.

Now it is very late, and I must get busy on my sleeping. Tomorrow I will posts some of the horrible pictures that Angela and Mama took of me all dressed up. Also I will be showing them to my lawyer, because I thinks that might be illegal in some states. I will keeps you all updated on how my case is progressing.

5 comments:

  1. Reuben -
    My mom has me on something called the green bean diet. I gets to eat a whole huge plate full of green beans with tasty morsels sprinkled on top like croutons. She thinks the green beans will fill me up and I no eat too much food. (I am stout and manly. Since I am part Aussie, I never know when I will have to run for days herding the sheep so I likes to be prepared.)

    I eats all the yummy green beans. And then I eats the food my skinny, silly sister (who just thinks she's in charge but no dog that skinny can run things) Oakley leaves behind.

    I's still stout. If no sheep show up, I will herd the squirrels.

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  2. Oh yeah - that comment is from Ralphie. I is so excited to be on your blog I forgot to tell you who I is.

    My mamma wrote about me in her blog. Something about being inconvenient. I no know what she means. I always hold it until she lets me outside.

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  3. Ralphie, I must say, you is a master of the dog language. You speaks it fluently! I has an impressed.

    Hmm, green beans. That no strikes me as delicious. Here is my advice: eat the croutons, then do a dog pouty face and wag your tail lots until your Mama feels sorry for you. And gives you a ribeye. And THEN you eats the rest of Oakley's foods.

    Of course, I is only joking. As one stout and manly dog to another, we needs to keep our physiques lean and mean. We is fighting machines. I does it all the time in my imaginations, and sometimes in the kitchen too.

    Where is your dogblog? I wants to read about your adventures!

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  4. Good luck tomorrrow Rueben, I'll be thinking of you!

    Kim

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  5. Reuben -

    I has no dog blog. My mamma steal all my cutes and wise things I do and my heroic actions for her own blog.

    The peoples loved it when she puts my picture in it but she no does that every time.

    I talk so good because I practices lots. But it is a very manly bark.

    ReplyDelete

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