Friday, April 12, 2013

cheese papers and green papers - what an exciting morning!

Friends, this morning I went on a grand adventure! There was so many magical, mythical places on our trip; hardly I knows where to begin. Oh wait, yes I does. I was so excited for the journey that I immediately throwed up on the passenger seat. I was right next to Mama's old sweatshirt, but I decided for personal reasons that really it would be best to puke on the upholstery. Geez Mama, I was trying to save your old sweatshirt!

You're welcome.
After a nice ride with my nose stuck out the window, quivering with excitement, and my ears flapping in the wind, we went to a place called "coffee shop." Mama lefted me in the car while she went in, unfortunately, but I had a great time barking at all of the uncaffinated passerbys and when she came out, she had a cup of Mama Juice and a sandwich too! She put sandwich into her purse and then we started driving again.


At a stoplight a nice man was selling newspapers, so of course I growled and barked at him with brave ferocities through my open window. He came up to the car (maybe he is deaf...? I was barking very loudly and fiercely) and says "how old he is? About 5?" Mama laughed and then made up a number for my age, since we no knows how old I is at all, only that I is dignified senior gentleman. His jaw dropped and we sped away down the road!

I no looks a day over 5, it is because I takes good care of my personal Self! With lots of sleeping.

The next stop on our journey was called "bank." Again I had to stay in car while Mama went inside and did something boring with green papers. When she came out, that is when she opened the sandwich! She helped me eat it.

She says that I helped her eat it. This no is true.

Finally we drove to a place called "house that mama and daddy used to live in but now they rent it out and the tenant got evicted moved out and now they wants to put it on the market but first has to pay some repairmans some monies to fix all of the broken things." I guess that is what she needed the green papers for. Again she very rudely left me in the car, but this time she also lefted her coffee cup and the cheese paper from the sandwich! When she camed back I had nommed on the cheese paper and done a very thorough licking of the top of her coffee cup. "Oh Reuben..." she sighed, probably because I is adorable.

Carefully I eyes my prey as I waits for the right moment to strike.

and that moment is...... NOW!!!!!!!

Then it was time to go home. I peed on my favorite plant as soon as I got out of the car. Well, maybe it no is my favorite, but it is definitely in the top 3. I sniffed and peed for a while, and Mama was having impatients, so she said "Reuben.... wanna eat?" and that usually works to get me inside. Except Mama was standing outside for so long waiting for me to finish sniffing and peeing that she forgot about how I licked all over her coffee cup and she started drinking it again. I came inside and had a little breakfastings, and now I has retired to the couch for my mid-morning nap. What an exciting day! Can we does it again tomorrow, Mama?

Oh how I loves to sniff things!

Sniff them, and then pee on them.


  1. OMD...OMD...I just peed all overs myself...I is laughin' likes an idiot! WHOA ME, dat was da most hilarious trip I has evers readed bouts. Okays, furst, I thinks it was awfully nice and considerate of you not to puke on your mom's sweatshirt. Peeps is funny bout their clothin' articles.
    Second, I too has nevers been in a coffee shop. Mum has said I need no more hypers and caffeine would makes me even more hypers. I not sees da point really. I is sures your mom was callin' your name cuz you do be so adorables.
    And third...STOP makin' me laugh so hard...BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh dude, I loves you!


  2. Just ignores me, I is comin' back to read dis again.


  3. Rueben you are cracking us up. What a great adventure. Peeps keeps tissues in her pockets as I drool at the mere thought of a squirrel which then cleans up. Sometimes she forgets which pocket she puts them and then uses them. He he so we are so with you and the coffee. Have a fabulous Friday.
    Best wishes Molly

  4. Its not so bad being left in the car if you have cheese paper to lick. Hope you get all the repairs done okay.
    Dip Bridge and Elliot x

  5. Reuben, you just crack us up. You can turn anything into a positively great time! of course having sandwich papers left in reach is helpful.

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & roxy

    SHE loves her OLD sweatshirts, so we think you did the right thing.

  6. OMD OMD a
    Post full of
    Paper Eating
    Peep Barkin
    Pukes and
    Peeing WHAT more could your loyal and Doubled over from laughter ever Pray fur?????

    I can NOT think of a More Excitement FILLED to the Rim with FINE FUN.
    Buddy you Made OUR day!!!

  7. Wow you had a very eventful day Reuben. I bet you are sound asleep right now. I hope you get to go and do it again(maybe not the puking part)

    Loveys Sasha

  8. :D Oh Reuben , you are the funniest dog I have ever had the pleasure to 'meet' !

  9. What a great day Reuben. Mmmmm, cheese paper. Lee and Phod

  10. Reuben that was a very very busy day BUT you kept mom in line and I'm sure helped her a lot too.
    I bet she was a ton of fun after she had her coffee
    Hugs madi your BFFF

  11. Love your story! The "Wheeeeeeee" picture made the Lady LOL for reals. Good job with the coffee cup, Duke has gotten the Mr.'s coffee more than once.
    Hope the repairmen do a good job on the other house and don't take too many green papers!

  12. Reuben, you had the perfect outing, pal! Every single thing a dog loves to do (except maybe the puking part) all rolled up in one grand adventure! Beauty sleep is so important. Glad you're resting up for next time.

    Susan and Wrigs

  13. What?!? Dog shamed and now this? How dare your Mama talk about your puker episode. I think this is just plain injustice.

    Why'd the newspaper person's jaw dropped?

  14. what an exciting day! throwing up was definitely in order :) when i get left in the car, i bark so much i embarrass my mom.

  15. What an awesome day! I'm so glad you got to eat some of that delicious sandwich.



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