Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Violation of the Reuben-Daddy Peace Agreement of 2012

suspicious dachshund
Step away from squeaky monkey.... slowly... I no wants to has to hurt you (much)

To: The International Committee of Human-Dog Relations
Re: Blatant Treaty Violation
October 3, 2012

To the President of the Governing Body:

I brings to your attention today a matter of grave and important..... importance. In a direct and blatant violation of the Reuben-Daddy Peace Agreement of October 2, 2012, Daddy has both purposefully and maliciously stepped upon my squeaky monkey, causing said monkey to emit a.... squeaky monkey sound.

I draws your attention to section 87, clause eleventy of the Treaty:

"No Daddy shall make an overt and deliberate motion in the direction of Reuben's chewies, regardless of the location of the chewies, the location of Reuben, or how ornery Daddy happens to be feeling at that particular moment."

And we all knows, because we has all read section 88 of the Treaty:

"Any attempt by Daddy to handle, manhandle, throw, sit upon, squeeze, or come within 87 foots of Reuben's chewies will elicit a warning bark from said Reuben. In the occurrance that the barkings is ignored by Daddy, subsequent biting actions will be taken."

Please note that the reccommended actions has been taken against Daddy for the unpardonable crime of chewy violation, and should such future events occur, similar actions will has repeatings, adjusted for the severity of the particular situation.

Thank you for your attention to this international incident.


Me, Reuben: a brave and handsome wiener dog


  1. You are so brave! this is such a breech of contract and a violation of your rights! What's a Reuben to do?!?

  2. Sounds like a serious offense. I only hope a war can be averted.

    Your pal,

  3. You were well within your rights, Reuben. It is a constant job to keep an eye on your squeaky toys. We hope this is an isolated incident and not the start of sumthin bigger. xoxo

  4. Do you need some dogs to go picket at your dad's work? That might make him think twice about violating the peace agreement again!

    Sam and Pippen

    1. That is a good idea, will you tell Daddy to go get a job so I can do picketing at it?

  5. Those daddys. They never learn do they?

  6. Oh my Reuben we will have to call in the UN troops and surround your chewies and squeakies to protect them from daddy. Tutt tutt tutt daddy! Have a wonderful Wednesday.
    Best wishes Molly

  7. Oh no Reuben! Not sections 87 & 88, please say it ain't so....

    We're thinking that if this behavior continues, you might have to get Sarge involved. Then Daddy better be watching his back and sleeping with one eye open.....

    Lily Belle & Muffin

  8. SURELY "HE" did NOT violate Section #87?? THAT is HORRID and you are RIGHT to have LODGED THIS COMPLAINT.. and within your RIGHTS to take ANY and ALL actions needed. WHEW!

  9. Oh my Dog, you are very right to point out Dad is violating your canine rights - you have been warned Dad, BOL!
    Dip Bridge and Elliot x

  10. Reuben, I can't believe that your Daddy violated your peace agreement! What on Earth was he thinking? Stepping on your squeaky monkey was definitely malicious and you were in your full right to both bark and bite! Show him you mean business!

  11. Say what!!! He needs to be fired from the Daddy position for one week!
    Benny & Lily

  12. Oooooo and interspecies incident! We're behind you one hundred percent!

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

  13. Pee in his shoe! Paybacks you know. :)

    Sarah & le Weens

  14. Reuben, I am always looking for an excuse to give the bitey!

  15. Oh no, Reuben! I hope squeaky monkey survived the incident. You make sure to get lots of treats as payback for his transgression.


  16. oh no! I hope there are sanctions for this. Our Lady won't sign treaties with us!
    Hailey and Zaphod

  17. Remind me to hire you for our contract negotiations...

    We are expecting company (unexpected, the kind mom doesn't like at all) this weekend... so we might not be around much.. Don't worry... we will be back soon, but not soon enough for her...

    Until then, we will miss you! :(

    Shelle, Milo, Dixie and Newby,

  18. Oh Reuben! How could he step on your squeaky monkey?? This is horrible, I hope those peoples reply to you soon


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