Another installment of Book Reviews Written by a Wiener Dog

It is time again for another Book Review Written by a Wiener Dog.

This is the book I read!

You may has a remembering for another time when I sawed this book (at the 2012 North Carolina Wiener Roast):

Mama and Leah was browsing through the childrens' books about dogs (and unfortunately catses) at the public library, and they was very pleased to find a copy of Gretchen the Bicycle Dog. At first I no was pleased with the selection, for some of you may has a knowing for my feelings towards Gretchen, the freakishly long legged doxador.

Look how she sucks up to my people sister!

Even Gretchen and Gretchen is the same color of dog. Truly it is uncanny. Except for one big difference: Gretchen (of the book) has a wheelchair, and my Gretchen no has one. But you knows what? Not having the use of her back legs no stopped book-Gretchen from doing many fun and brave adventurings. There is pictures of her in the snow and the fall leaves, on the boardwalk at the beach, posing with many childrens, and even taking a swim!

This is the closest I ever comes to swimming.

Book-Gretchen hurted her back when she was playing with - and here you no will believe this - an ORANGE KITTY.

This is my Hatfield sniffing my Gretchen.

It really makes a dog think how if one thing in their lives had been just a little bit different - like if I was trying to kill playing with Hatfield and I hurted my back - I could be in a wheelchair too. After book-Gretchen had surgeries and her back no improved, she had to drag herself around using her front legs. And she got pretty good at it too! But then her peoples gotted her a wheelchair, and from then there no was any stoppings of  this adventurous dog.

Does you think if I had wheels I could get down there? I thinks so!

My people sister really enjoyed this book, as me and Mama both did too. She read it to me all by herself last night in bed. Gretchen the Bicycle Dog is a story of many heartwarmings. I thinks that dogs, and peoples too, who has lost their mobilities has a big appreciation for the fun adventures that might be around any corner. For they knows that even though they has to work a little harder at it, things could has been much worse for them, so they does countings of their blessings and just enjoys life and has happies. I think we all can has many learnings from book-Gretchen.

The End.

This has been another Book Review Written by a Wiener Dog.

Me, Reuben, at the 2012 North Carolina Wiener Roast

It has been over a week since I did my appearance at the 2012 North Carolina Wiener Roast, and still I no has told the epic tale of my adventures there. They says a picture is worth eleventy-million words, so here I posts my lovely photos from this beautiful day held in honor of me, Reuben, a dachshund (maybe some other dachshunds was honored there too - I no is sure, for I was so busy honoring myself).

First we went into the vendor area, where I metted this pretty lady. I think she was too busy being beautiful to notice me :(

Check out her sweet wheels!

 Then I has comed upon an unfortunate thing: Yes, it is a book about a dachshund named Gretchen.

Why this book no is called "Reuben?"

 After I stopped by the Almost Home Dachshund Rescue booth (they has putted on the event, and I is very proud to serve as totally unofficial spokesdog), we went outside to the adopting area. where Leah petted these very nice dogs from who I think was Furever Dachshund Rescue.

We no is taking them home Mama, right? RIGHT?!

Then we walked across the bridge to has more adventures.

Now where is we going?! Does they has food over here?!

First I had to pee on something.

I made sure it was on the carpet. 

Oh! Almost I has forgot to mention that Mama boughted me this new jacket-harness thing. I suffered great indignities due to this thing, for everyone thought I was a girl kind of dachshund. So I had to pee on many, many things to prove otherwise.

This is an example of me peeing.

Then I thought I was in a magical place, for I sawed bags and bags of foodstuffs! I assumed they was all for me, but Mama and Leah had other plans.

I will have one bag for here and the rest to go, please.

 Lucky for me, the other plans included hot dogs!!!

No wiener dogs was harmed in the makings of these hot dogs.

 Leah gotted one, and here I is, expectantly waiting for her to give it to me.

Leah, why is you eating my hot dog?

Then Leah was full, and since it was my special day, I gotted to eat the rest of it!

Back off wiener dog, this is MY wiener dog!

 It took many hours and days for me to eat it, due to my lack of tooths. Here you sees me tirelessly chewing it, and also my very fearsome two front tooths!

*nom nom nom nom*

Then, oh joyful of joys, I gotted my very own ice cream treat, just for me! It was a frozen banana with some vanillas and honeys and creams, and it was extremely delicious and also extremely frozen and very hard to eat.

Bravely I eats it all though.

Leah gotted an ice cream treat too.

I no can has the chocolates. Does you see how Leah mocks me here?!

 Then it was time for the very last event of the day - the wiener races! At first Mama no wanted me to enter, for never has I run in one before (that we know of), and I is a senior kind of dog. But Leah knew that I was fast and brave, so she insisted that I enter in the senior category, so I did! Here is an example of some other wieners doing racings:

They must be chasing foodstuffs, or maybe squeaky chewies.

I no has a photo of me in the race, for Mama and Leah was too busy helping me. I went to the starting line with Mama, and Leah went to the finishing line to cheer me on. There was four other dogs doing racings, and everyone had a great excited, and even gave a special round of clappings for me (they said it was for all the senior racers, but really I knows it was for me, Reuben). When we heard the word "go," we was off! Well, the other dogs was anyway. I ran a few steps, but then I was worried to leave Mama all alone at the starting line. So I walked back to her, and then I kept going past her, for I smelled something tasty behind the starting line. Mama came and picked me up and putted me back on the race track, but I no had an interested and frankly wanted to get back to the delicious-smelling thing. I think they should have gived the trophy to me, Reuben, for smelling out the foodstuffs and pursuing them, for dachshunds is the best at that kind of thing. Then camed a very special race - dachshunds on wheels! Here they is at the starting line:

Yes it is true, they all ranned faster than me.

 Then the Wiener Roast was over. And I was very very hot and tired. Here is an example of my magnificent tongue in the car on the way home:

It is quite a beautiful and majestic tongue.

I had so much fun! I especially enjoyed the complimentary treats. It was a great day and I no can wait to go back tomorrow! What's that, Mama? There no is another one until next year? That is very silly, I is thinking, for it is so much fun that it should be every day!